All-Stars From the Rail

PiMaster's sterling performances on the WSOP rail the last couple years got me thinking about where he ranks on the all-time list of great sweaters. With a little help from the Gambler, I constructed a top 10 based on three criteria: passion/consistency, uniqueness, and unintentional comedy.

Honorable mention:

Jack Nicholson, Victoria Beckham, Da Bears fans from SNL, Jerome Bettis' parents, Kevin O'Donnell's daughter, Joy Cloutier, Rob Schneider from The Waterboy, Marcos Baghdatis' girlfriend, Glenn Close from The Natural.

10. Shirley Williams - 15
Passion/consistency: 3
Uniqueness: 5
Unintentional comedy: 7
Shirley really only had one shining moment, during the 2004 WSOP when her son David made a run to 2nd place in the Main Event. Since then Shirley's profile has risen as her poker game improves, but her railing has petered out.

7. Earl Woods - 17
Passion/consistency: 9
Uniqueness: 3
Unintentional comedy: 5
Unfortunately, questions about his integrity as a sweater (appeared to want his own piece of the pie) and death tarnish this ranking.

7. Spike Lee - 17
Passion/consistency: 8
Uniqueness: 4
Unintentional comedy: 5
Spike gave us some great moments during his feud with Reggie Miller, but hasn't done much to distinguish himself since.

7. Daniel Negreanu's mom - 17
Passion/consistency: 5
Uniqueness: 5
Unintentional comedy: 7
Takes railing beyond the game, cooking and caring for her son. Sports an accent, a big bonus in the world of competitive railing.

5. Bridget Wilson-Sampras -18
Passion/consistency: 5
Uniqueness: 3
Unintentional comedy: 3
*5 bonus points for attractiveness, 2 bonus points for starring in Billy Madison

5. Jim Wasicka - 18
Passion/consistency: 7
Uniqueness: 3
Unintentional comedy: 8
Like a rock, Jim watched the entire WSOP final table motionless behind sunglasses (though the room was very dark). I'm told this was the same method he used watching Paul play sports as a kid.

4. Eva Longoria - 19
Passion/consistency: 7
Uniqueness: 6
Unintentional comedy: 1
*5 bonus points for attractiveness

2. PiMaster - 22
Passion/consistency: 9
Uniqueness: 5
Unintentional comedy: 8
I move to change Pi's name to "RailMaster" or "SweatMaster"

2. Nancy Kerrigan's mom - 22
Passion/consistency: 6
Uniqueness: 7
Unintentional comedy: 9
A blind railbird. It doesn't get more spirited than that.

1. Richard Williams - 23
Passion/consistency: 10
Uniqueness: 5
Unintentional comedy: 8
No one's been doing it for longer, no one's been doing it more consistently, and no one's had more success.